Cars 2

If you have any knowledge of preschool kids (preferably legal), then you know that to them the original Cars is a certified phenomenon. And the reason, as far as I can tell through my diligent journalistic research, is simple: the movie is, well, simple. Sure, there's the required kids movie message about, I don't know, friendship or fitting in or something, but it is also about cars talking, joking, and most importantly, racing. There's really not much that even the most average child wouldn't understand (not that every child isn't special in his or her own way, or something).

Cars 2 suffers from the typical forced sequel ailment: it's too complicated. Good ol' Lightning McQueen is relegated to a supporting role, as are the race sequences (which are once again fabulously animated), in favor of goofy sidekick Mater falling into an international spy ring conspiracy involving a mysterious alternative energy source. That sounds more like Paul Greengrass and Matt Damon's next project than something for 4 year olds. And Mater, like most comic relief, is best served as a side dish. The movie is still loaded with the usual Pixar cleverness, though there is a lot more generic violence that seems out of place in one of their movies.

There are definite pluses, most of which involve the John Turturro-voiced Formula One racer, Francesco Bernoulli. And then there is the voice-cameo from none other than the man himself, Bruce Campbell. Okay, that was pretty cool. There is a lot to like here, but I think they missed the mark in following up the original. I'm sure I will see this numerous more times and my opinion may change, but for now I have to give it a heavy-hearted...MINUS.

Playlist: Toy Story 3

The no-brainer Oscar pool pick in what was a down year for animated films (though I did enjoy How to Train Your Dragon). Not that it would have mattered, really. The quality of the entire TS trilogy has been amazingly consistent. And clever. The use of thoughtful visuals and character details that enhance the viewing experience is in stark contrast to what's become the standard cartoon throwaway sight gag crutch. This is probably what gives Pixar films their "heart" compared to the dreck of Shrek.

Which is all well and good, but I know what you want. You want to know if I cried. Apparently, everyone else did. Everyone. So, in what may be the shock of the year, I didn't. Not that I didn't get a little ocularly moist. I did. I'm not that big of a bastard. But I knew it was coming and that took a bit of the edge off, or at least allowed my testosterone to lay down a protective layer of machismo. It's that damn nostalgia, isn't it? It's the disease of this generation, by which I mean my generation, of which you have no idea since I am ageless on the Internet. Not immortal, exactly. More like interminable.

So, have I ever cried during a movie? Maybe. Maybe during The Pride of the Yankees. Best speech ever. Field of Dreams. Maybe Big Fish. We're not talking breakdown here, like the teenage girl in front of me during Titanic who seriously needed her coven of BFFs to help her out of the theater. We're talking about those moments that get you right there (tap your chest...no, a little lower). And it's nothing to be ashamed of either. We're being manipulated. Hell, we're paying to be manipulated. It's the same reason why you shouldn't try to stop your toe from tapping during some crappy pop song. Someone spent millions of dollars figuring out how to make you do that. Who the hell are you to stop it?

Thought of another one: The Road. Yes, I see a theme: baseball and fathers. The Road hitting me from the other side of paternity. Everyone has an emotional weakness. What's yours? What movies made you wet?

Hold on, that sounds like a Vin post. What movies made you cry?

Playlist: Fantastic Mr. Fox

Here were the 2009 Oscar nominees for Best Animated Film: Coraline, Fantastic Mr. Fox, The Princess and the Frog, The Secret of Kells, and Up.

Like just about everyone else in this country, I haven't scene The Secret of Kells. It killed in Europe and we all know their impeccable taste. It's about 9th century monks--what's not to like, you know, other than the 9th century monk part? Really, monks peaked in the 640s.

Coraline came with both cred guns blazing: it was directed by Henry Selick (The Nightmare Before Christmas) and based on a book by Neil Gaiman (uh, Coraline). And it was 3-D, but old school terrible 3-D. It looks terrific and captures the creepy PG tone of the book. No complaints.

Disney mouth-to-mouthed classic 2-D animation with The Princess and the Frog and...ok, they finally figured out that it was okay to sell dolls to African-American girls as well. Princess Tiana: the Jackie Robinson of crass commercialism.
Up won, of course, because it was a Pixar film. Not that it wasn't good--it was, and deserves some sort of prize for making kids sit through one of the most beautifully depressing sequences in movie history before they got to the talking dog. But it also received a Best Picture nomination as well...I don't know, though. I think it was over-hyped by the time I saw it. Or maybe the Pixar formula has been perfected to predictability at this point. Whatever the case...

...I though Mr. Fox was the best animated film of the year. What won me over was that it was an animated movie that not only didn't try to hide the fact that it's an animated movie but reveled in it. There's just an infectious giddiness, from George Clooney's over-the-top swagger as the lead voice to the manic stop-motion movements and gestures. But most of all, it captured director Wes Anderson's eccentric whimsy that can sometimes get too cute for its own good in his live action films. Or: it was fun.

Playlist: 9

Waiting for this to load (slowly--I fear I may need a new DVD player), I was expecting a cute little story told in, what the trailer promised to be, visually stunning animation. My eyes were not disappointed. 

Shane Acker's story, however, was, well, it was less cute and more...set in a dystopian nightmarescape, the aftermath of mankind's global annihilation at the mechanized hands of its sentient machines. The only "living" beings left are 9 enchanted rag dolls created by the man who was forced by his fascist government to first invent the super computer that would lead to human doom. And you know what? I loved it. I was happy to see that it strove to be something more than just another happy meal theme, that it wasn't scared to be scary.

Then I began wondering why I hadn't heard more buzz about this. Hadn't really heard any buzz, to be honest. Turns out, it was written off after mostly lukewarm reviews. So, who else has seen it? Am I missing something here?

Below, Acker's original film school short: